Things Not To Say To Your Wife When…

She’s pregnant:

  • “I just didn’t realize that you would get so big!”
  • “I don’t understand why you’re so tired. You haven’t done anything today.”
  • “Well, you definitely look pregnant.”

She’s in labor:

  • “Come on, it’s not that bad.”
  • “You don’t hear me complaining.”
  • “I had a headache once that probably felt similar to this.”
  • “Just breathe.”

When she’s leaving the hospital:

  • “Wow, you still look sort of pregnant.”
  • “You know that tonight is Monday Night Football, right?”


  • Jenn says:

    It can be good to have a newborn in the Fall – when we did – Daddy had ‘special’ alone time with the baby while he stayed up and watched football while Mom got a nap!

  • Brando says:

    I hope you didn’t learn these tips by experience!

  • Stephen Altrogge says:

    Yes football is a wonderful gift from God when it comes to watching a newborn. I love it.

    And no, I didn’t learn these tips by experience…

  • Trillia says:

    Hilarious! Yeah- leaving the hospital and telling your wife she still looks pregnant may not go over to well!

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