The Cost Of Honoring


Sunday we attended the funeral of my wife Kristi’s mom, Charlot.

Charlot lived a full 92 years, and until the last 8 months of her life had been independent and active. But a cyst in her brain gradually stole her balance, then her ability to walk, her independence, and eventually her life.

Charlot had no desire to leave her home, nor her precious dog Dudley, so Kristi and her sisters cared for Charlot at home till the end. At first it involved driving her to many doctors appointments and her all-important weekly visit to the hair dresser. But as the months went by, it became necessary for someone to be with Charlot around the clock.

Near the end, when Charlot couldn’t walk, Kristi and her sisters had to dress her, bathe her, lift her out of bed and into her wheelchair, then lift her into her chair in the den. It was physically demanding and emotionally draining as well, watching their mom decline.

The four daughters paid a price to honor their mother. They sacrificed time, energy, and personal convenience. They spent whole days caring for Charlot’s every need. They gave up their evenings to watch Judge Judy and Rachael Ray with her. They made sure she was comfortable till the end.

And I never heard a word of complaint from any them.

Not everyone has this kind of opportunity to honor their parent. But we all have times we’re called to serve when it’s not convenient. I want honor others unselfishly and cheerfully no matter what the cost.

photo by Eric Hands

I’m a pastor at Saving Grace Church in Indiana, PA. I’m married to Kristi, have 5 kids, and a growing number of grandkids. I enjoy songwriting, oil painting and coffee, not necessarily in that order.