After the first 15 hours, our doctor had given us good news and bad news dozens of times, around the clock, and we were exhausted. “Your son is very sick, but we’re hoping for him to recover from whatever his body is fighting,” he said.
The doctor before him had looked me in the eyes and said, “Babies like this just simply do not live, you maybe have seven days, but it will most likely be shorter”.
And he was right. Our newborn, with a mysterious virus, was in our hands when he breathed his last and greeted Jesus in eternity after just 40 hours of life. God would show us goodness and mercy in the valley of the shadow of death.
How is it that God plans to care for us when the thick fog of grief is all we see? How can God tell us goodness and mercy shall follow us all of our days when a lot of those days are so full of pain?
The Lord has shown me how to have hope in the midst of our grief from both Psalm 23:6 and Romans 8:32.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
all the days of my life… Psalm 23:6
He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? Romans 8:32
The Cross Provided The Supply of Hope
Goodness and mercy are poured out from a well with endless supply because God did not spare his own son, but gave him up for us all. That which was most valuable to him, he crushed, turned away from, and then pressed fully all his anger from our sin onto him so that we might be spared instead.
Here was the beginning of the overflowing cup of hope that would be our living water in the midst of pain and suffering.
Goodness and Mercy Even In Your Darkest Day
God’s promise of goodness and mercy following us all the days of our lives, truly means all our days. All our days means even our darkest days. This endless cup of grace and love from the Father is in our hands, even when we stand over the grave of those we love most.
Goodness and mercy are following us when we lose our income, when we suffer from long-term physical pain, when the dream of a wife still hasn’t come true, when we lose our ability to walk from a horrific accident, when we realize we have a child with special needs, when our son grows and becomes wayward, when our spouse packs up and leaves, when our parents grow old and we have to make funeral arrangements, when the doctor says the disease is terminal, when our womb is empty.
These are not the days that goodness and mercy leave us. Goodness and mercy were bought with blood and are faithful in the days of pain.
He Will Care For Our Every Need
If God himself did not open the heavens and save his son by bringing him down from that cross, but gave him up as a sacrifice for our sin, how will he not meet us in our own pain and suffering?
How could God look away from us and leave us in our pain if he has united us to himself through the giving up of his perfect Son? He will care for us.
I thought my darkest day would surely overwhelm me and swallow me whole, but the spirit came and reminded me that goodness and mercy were surrounding me as I laid my son in the grave. And the valleys ahead will have cups of goodness and mercy waiting for me as the Father cares for my every need.